Product Descriptions
- Gift Shop
Funny Product Descriptions
A swanky soon-to-be online gift shop needed product descriptions to complement its sassy humor. After laughing at their hilarious designs, we knew the copy had to be just as snarky!
The shop is still in the design phase, so these aren't published yet. But read below for a scripted glance into this cool shop's future splash into the print-on-demand gift market!
Women’s Funny Wine T-Shirt with Attitude
When you have something to say, then say it! And wear it too! Let us slap it on a t-shirt for wearable art or pick this t-shirt that’s already shouting what you’re thinking. Loud and proud – that’s how we do it ‘round here!
“Corks are for quitters” – and you’re no quitter! No, ma’am – just chug it! And, that cork? Yeah, make some darling art with that thing. You sure won’t need it to plug up that bottle again. Now that you got it outta the way, get to drinking!
Want the specs?
Sublimation printing means you get a design that won’t peel, crack or wash off – yay!
The tee is a cotton/poly blend so it won’t shrink – unless you’re drinking too many beers
And yes, you can put it in the washer and dryer –but be kind ‘cause it likes it cold and low
It’s been bleach striped – cool, huh? Yeah, we think so too – we like a normal tee with a laid-back vibe
Sorry, no refunds or returns. But, heck you’re gonna love this.
A Damn Good “She is Fearless” Ponytail Cap
We’re so obsessed with tattered and torn apparel and for good reason! Who wants to look all prim and proper?
Be comfortable and look great! Just roll out of bed and shove your ponytail out the back end of this cool denim baseball cap. That’s so much better.
This hat’s keeping it real – cause we live by the Proverbs, at least until we don’t. So, order this ripped-up cap, looking like it’s had more than a few days out on the farm and we’ll glam it up with a “She is Fearless” sign.
You’ll want these specs:
It’s a one-size-fits-most-women with an adjustable band – but if your head’s super big ‘cause you’re so smart or just like to think you are, maybe you should pass on it
It’s made with a mesh surround – keeping it cool
Please don’t message us “This hat’s all frayed like it’s been used!” – it’s made like that and we’re just gonna laugh
Sorry, no refunds or returns. Someone you know will love it, so just pass it on if it doesn’t work for ya.
Just a Little Bit Bitchy Coffee Mug
Coffee mugs seem to come and go, don’t they? I mean, where’s my Homer Simpson mug?
You need one that’s important to you so you’ll keep up with it. That’s why we make ‘em with a big ole’ bustin’ personality! It’s like your best pal, always right there making you grin, sometimes sadistically.
This one is a fave – made especially for the ladies. With its pretty flowers and modern black and white style, it was designed for a fine upper-class princess like yourself.
That’s B.S. – we made it for sassy broads who make fun of the princesses of the world! If you know a broad, she’ll love it.
You know what coffee mugs are:
Yes, it’s standard size
Yes, it’s microwave and dishwasher safe
No, don’t throw it at anybody – unless you like jail, then wait a sec while we get popcorn
Sorry, no refunds or returns. I mean why would you want to?
Personalize a Puzzle of Family, Friends or Precious Pets
So your girlfriend’s in love with her cat, huh?
Or maybe it’s your mom and she’s gaga over those grandkids of hers.
Yeah, they’ll love this.
Send us a pic and we’ll toss it on a puzzle and you’ll be the hit of the birthday bash! All those laughs and oohs and ahhs – all for you.
Who knew a custom puzzle would cause such a fuss? But, you deserve it. So blush a little, say it was nothing and beam inside.
There’s not much to say about this, except:
Its sublimation printing, so it’s bright and crisp – great for capturing those cute little smiles
It measures 24 x 18 inches and it has about a 100 pieces
Ummm… nothing more, but it was weird to have just 2 bullets
Come on, get on it – find the best digital image of those people, pets or things you love and send it our way. Try to make it a funny pic so we can laugh too.
Oh, sorry no refunds or returns. Pretty obvious why.
Super Soft Women’s T-Shirt with a Cute Dog in a Baseball Cap
Hey, hey – you want it, so load up! This cute tee will be the one you grab time after time – it’s comfy, cool and attracts attention.
It’s kinda like carrying a puppy around with you. People naturally turn to look, then wham, they’re right there fawning over ya!
It’s so soft you’ll be yelling “No! You can’t have my shirt! Back off! Get your own!” Then, please send them our way. ‘Cause we’ll get ‘em a damn shirt of their own.
Here’s the deets:
Sublimation printed so it’s rock-solid with no chipping, unlike your nails
100% cotton and not that rough stuff either - no, this is the kind you wanna sleep in
Wash it and dry it like you do the other t-shirts you like, not the ones you tossed on the floor 3 months ago
No refunds, so check the size chart! We’re not responsible if you didn’t measure yourself. Just sayin’.